Lettuce pray that this too shall pass away

Testosterone, Messi, illegal voting, Canadian smoke, a $3,500 rebate and Bourne again

MONTEZUMA’S REVENGE ... It’s entirely likely that the tainted lettuce causing nasty symptoms all over our blessed land was picked by some of the very folks that ICE chased through the strawberry fields of Ventura County and eventually deported to Mexico.

TESTING TESTES ... You can add low testosterone to bone spurs as one of the conditions that will disqualify you from being a valued warfighter in this country.

Of course, Pistol Pete Hegseth will generously offer wimpy soldiers the opportunity to boost their testosterone to manly levels, which just happens to be the very definition of gender-affirming care.