Trump has plans to "expand our territory," but where will that be?
Carrie Underwood's a capella sing-along was the highlight for many
O CANADA ... For me, the most striking part of Donald Trump's 27-minute inaugural speech came near the end when he said "The United States will once again consider itself a growing nation, one that increases our wealth, expands our territory and carries our flag into new and beautiful horizons."
Wonderful words, to be sure, unless you happen to be a citizen of one of those places we plan to "expand" into.
And how come we didn't hear even a whisper of these expansionist plans during the campaign?
When and if we do expand - and the president seems quite determined that we will - I certainly hope it will include Victoria, British Columbia, truly one of the most beautiful cities in North America.
And, while we're in the neighborhood, we may as well take Banff, too.
If you have a favorite place you'd like to add to your manifest destiny, please let me know and I'll pass it along the chain of command.
CROWD CARRIES CARRIE ... Donald Trump stole a line from the UC Davis alma mater, "Hail to California," which is used throughout the UC system.
You know, the part where we sing "Rallying round her banner, We will never fail."
In the next to last paragraph of his speech, Trump noted "We will not be conquered, we will not be intimidated, we will not be broken and we will not fail."
No more than 30 seconds after our new president said "we will not fail," the sound system at the Capitol did indeed fail as Carrie Underwood waited to sing "America the Beautiful."
After the most awkward 118 seconds of silence in American history, Underwood - calm, cool and classy throughout - looked out at the audience, said "You know the words, help me out," then delivered a stirring a cappella version of one of the most beautiful ballads in our patriotic song book.
PASTOR NEEDS A GEOGRAPHY LESSON ... In a fiery prayer near the end of the inauguration ceremony, Detroit pastor Lorenzo Sewell shouted "From the mighty mountains of New York to the curvaceous hilltops of California."
With all due respect to a man of the cloth, the mightiest mountain in New York State, Mount Marcy, stands 5,344 feet above sea level.
The "curvaceous hilltop" of California's Mount Whitney, meanwhile, stretches 14,505 feet toward the heavens.
The good pastor clearly needs to get out of Detroit a bit more often.
Go west, young man.